Should I say a "happy" new year?

1/01/2014 03:18:00 AM

I don't think it's necessary for my case, or somebody out there to say this with a big smiley face. I never thought of disliking this day, to be honest. I did not expect I would turn into this Ashton Kutcher on New Year's Eve. Yet God gave me something to learn today, you'll never expect what God has for you.


I don't know if I'm going to turn into a Randy, to be clear. I just don't feel the same way as I did  last year. If I could just run away on new year's eve, I would. But my dearest friend, and my new acquaintance in the far away and beautiful country, also gave me some clarity. They know what I went through, and they understand.

When people said, "Don't judge people by its cover.", they're not joking. Others could laugh about that words if someone brings it since it's what people usually do. Today, I acknowledged a lot of things actually, one of them is regarding my dearest friend. Although I can say she's my besties, but in fact, so little that I actually know about her to really judge her. I know her favs, dislikes and hobbies, made me feel like I have enough excuse to judge her. But no, I don't have it.

When I finally know her story, my mind completely exploded by the fact that I was completely wrong about her. Even if I felt like we're besties, I haven't had the right to judge her, because it can be wrong. Or it will always be wrong

I also acknowledged something related to my family. It's my personal problem, so yeah I don't really want to talk about it in the face of people around the world. But let me tell you, it completely blown up my mind. I just want to curl and cry in the choir room like Joey did in Me and My D*ck (hello starkids out there), ok. 

However, let me tell you something, readers. Today, I learned a lot of things from a lot of different people. Unfortunately, it wasn't a happy dopey that I can write a whole details about it on this public blog. I hope what I learned in the beginning of 2014 will make me someone better, and I could start a whole brand new experience and changing myself for good.

It is 3:18 AM in Jakarta. Hopefully I can close my eyes and trasport into the dreamland. Happy New Year 2014!

“You don't get explanations in real life. You just get moments that are absolutely, utterly, inexplicably odd.” ― Neil Gaiman

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